Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Joys ???

23 weeks and still the morning sickness hits me at the most GRANDEST times!!! Walking the dogs (that’s great … walking 2 very stubborn dogs and tryin to hurry out of the sight of three homes early in the morning ….), in the shower (I guess that’s a decent place), having to speed across the Dames Ponte bridge to make it to the shoulder of the HWY (thank goodness I could talk my way out of a ticket if need be hahaa) …

Heartburn is still amazingly sticking around (totally not enough ice cream or zantac to keep this crap away), the back aches have calmed some – but now the charlie horses have arrived!! Not only have those things arrived but the emotional outbursts have hit!!!

On Saturday morning (12-12) I was packing my car for work, walked out the garage shut the door and freakin realized I left my keys in the house, went back to get them – house was locked. AWESOME! So I walk out the garage into the rain (we were having our Christmas party at work so I actually put on makeup and did my hair) around to front door rang the door bell for Billy to come open the door – I can hear both dogs in our bedroom going banananas …… but no Billy. I rang that sucker for 15 mins, banging on the door and then begin to cry. Praying my neighbors didn’t see or hear what was going on!!! SOOOO I went around IN THE RAIN to our bedroom window and banged on it (again praying about the neighbor situation but also that Billy wouldn’t shoot me) for a good 10 mins still nothing. So apparently he had A LOT of fun at his squad party the night before and he wasn’t waking up. FINALLY he I hear “WHAT” I yelled (if you can while crying) go open the garage door. “OK” … off to the garage door I go to wait. I hear him scuffling around then I hear our secretly alarm start to blare. Yep – he opened the sliding door in back where he thought I would be – makes sense but if the stupid alarm is on – that door cannot be open without AWE setting if off. SOOO … now I’m crying, soaking wet, alarm blaring, dogs going insane, Billy’s standing in the middle of the living room with shorts on just grinning and trying not to laugh. The lady comes over the speaker ask if all is ok and I know I sounded so rude but I yelled at her “FINE – my husband locked me out of the house!!!” He just grinned, hugged me and went back to bed!!!

Awesome start to that day!!

Sunday - we went to the Jags v Dolphins game – all was great that whole day – I was happy, excited, complained a tad about the heat and having to pee so much. Got home – and EVERYTHING annoyed the crap out of me. Billy knows the he can push my buttons and he does it so well just to be BILLY. I had enough and he did one last thing and I just busted into tears, ran to the bedroom (well ok not really ran but waddled really fast) and slammed the door. He comes in a good 10 mins later ( I guess he knew to be safe) and tries his best to console me but is laughing the entire time. Didn’t help me. OHHH Finally I calm myself and the night goes better. Monday – I am refilling my pill box (yea like the ones that are in the geritol section haha sorry Mom) and I didn’t close the lids and just flipped all the pills everywhere. I started to cry. Billy comes over and is putting them all back and I just KNOW he is grinning, I can feel it and I look over and yep he is grinning from ear to ear. I just walked off.

I pulled out one of my MANY baby books and read him the section on being supportive with the emotions of a pregnant woman. He just laughed!! He knows I was a roller coaster BEFORE the pregnancy – he isn’t all that worried now ha!!

At the doctor’s office the nurse tells me I’ve gained 7lbs – I just kinda sulked and sat down and she snickered and I looked at her and she straightens her face and said “it’s ok –normally you gain between 12-15 lbs right now in this stage” I asked her if that was suppose to make me feel better. She didn’t find that funny. The doc appt was great!! Lil Landon is growing at a great rate, healthy, heartbeat is super strong and he is now kicking (moving around whatever) more and I LOVE IT!!!

So that is my vent for the week with the pregnancy. All that and those who are also pregnant telling me all their JOYS of pregnancy - puke - I try to be excited but wow, it's hard when I haven't had a good go at it so far (tests, tests, tests). OK so that was a bit "childish". I swear if one more person tells me – “OH YOU WILL MISS BEING PREGNANT” – I will hit them. And I do mean that.

Friday, December 11, 2009

17 weeks to go, Work, Family ....

Tomorrow hits the 23rd week of pregzilla. Yea – I think I have reached this point many times over the past few weeks. Along with still being sick, back aches, peeing more and more, possible bladder infection … my patience is non-existent. When people tell me “you will miss being pregnant” I want to slap them. My annoyance level (well we all know how fast I can fly off the handle anyways) is insane! Just a smart look from one of my students’ throws me into this fiery death stare that I think scares them into shutting up and sitting down. Why do I work with high school students? :-)

Each week I call my mom and apologize for SOMETHING that I did as a teen!! I need to write a book! HA. I work with some great kiddos – they can push me all over the place with their attitudes and make me wanna lay hands on them and we have had many COME TO JESUS talks!! But I love it! To be ask for a letter of recommendation, receive a prom picture, receive a senior picture, receive a graduation invitation – totally makes all the headaches worth it!! I have some “rough-edge” students who have been thru more than some adults or other teens will have SEE. Homelessness, parents passing away, parents in jail, abuse, working jobs so they can support their 3 siblings … I could go on. Deep down some of these kids just want acceptance, love and respect from an adult. I just hope I can give them a bit of that!! They are students who the schools are slowly letting slip thru the cracks and that really upsets me. These are great students who need that extra push!!! NEEDLESS to say – with the entire political BS that comes with my job – I do love working with these students!!!!

It’s hard to relate to them at times – I do know that growing up I went without things I WANTED never anything I needed and my parents made sure that me and my sister (even friends and family who needed the help) got the necessities!! Talk about feeling like crap sometimes looking back and being so angry with my parents for not letting me go skating that weekend! My folks still work hard for everything they have and want – they are definitely the parents I strive to be!! They went without a lot so that Jay and I could have things we WANTED! And good lord they still do! My dad says he’ll work till Jesus comes … haha!!! I can’t believe I am nearly 5 months and my mom hasn’t seen me pregnant!!! The week we go home I’ll be a week shy of that 5 month mark and wow – I can’t tell you guys how excited I am for my mom to get to see me. It’s been hard living this far from them (driving distance like 17 hours) to begin with – but now – whew it’s super hard. It’s hard to anyways with no family around (ok no blood family – we have made such wonderful friends here who I consider family that have been wonderful to us thru A LOT and they mean the world to us) to go thru “things” and then holidays not having them around. HOWEVER – the fun of going home or having them come down – WOW! I love it!!!

Billy is just head over heels for his job!! It’s so amazing to see him so happy in his career!! He’s making great contacts and is making a name for himself. The jokester being one, but he is so respected by higher ups and the veteran guys he works with have so much respect for him and compliment him all the time on how he is doing so great with what experience he has!! GOTTA BRAG ON MY BOO haha!! He has worked SO very hard for this and has sacrificed a lot and I’m so freakin proud of him!! He has more than just patrolman in goal and I know he will reach it soon!!!!

The weather here hasn’t been very Christmas friendly!! One day it’s 80 next its 75 next its 65 then 80 again! I told Billy I need to spray some fake snow or ice on the house!!! So I’m praying it’s like in the 30s when go home! HAHA Course Billy loves this shorts/tee weather in December!! Drives me nuts!

Hope you all are doing well and that we get to visit with some of you when we head back home in a few days!! If not – possibly on the trip we make back in January :-)